


*Worthy of Love Anyway

by ALittleWren



Category: Neighbours (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-18
Updated: 2020-03-18
Packaged: 2021-02-28 20:21:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,629
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23203141
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ALittleWren/pseuds/ALittleWren
Summary: Over the course of his relationship with Terese, it was the quiet moments that Paul had come to cherish the most.
Relationships: Paul Robinson/Terese Willis
Comments: 4
Kudos: 11





	*Worthy of Love Anyway

**Author's Note:**

> Hi there! Turns out fanfic writing is a little addictive so I'm back again!
> 
> This doesn't really have a place in current canon, and doesn't reference any spoilers, if you're avoiding them for the 35th, I guess it's more of a character study (I think?), in part inspired by just_another_daydreamer's lovely fic 'Thoughts at Dawn'.  
> It's a tad waffly, I was a little giddy, after Tuesdays episode, hopefully you don't mind.  
> Just a quick warning, there is a brief reference to bulimia about 3/4 of the way through, so please take care.

Over the course of his relationship with Terese, it was the quiet moments that Paul had really come to cherish the most. The big moments were great- better than great, actually, but it was the little mundane moments he’s waited all those years for. 

Like the evenings when they’re sat in front of the television and Terese ends up falling asleep on his shoulder. Or when they’re sat out in the garden on a clear night and she points out all the various constellations. The moments when she randomly slips Greek words and phrases into conversation, because she’s not fully paying attention, or has genuinely forgotten that he can’t understand her. Those moments are usually followed by a period of confused silence, as she sifts through what she’s just said to figure out where she went wrong.

It was why, stupid as it sounded, getting ready together in the mornings was one of his favourite things to do.

It’s in these quiet moments that Terese is most _Terese_. She wasn’t running a multimillion-dollar business or convincing a boardroom full of people that she deserved to be there just as much as them or navigating the many dramas of the three kids they’d somehow managed to collect. She was just Terese; vulnerable, compassionate, wise; battered and bruised and slightly broken.  
Much like him, really.  
He often thought that was why their emotional connection had always been so strong- they both knew what it was to feel broken. 

He looks over at her, whilst he’s searching for the cufflinks he wants. She’s sat at her dressing table, going through the drawers and selecting the various makeup products she wants to use this morning out of her extensive collection. Paul had always assumed that one type of mascara achieved much the same as any other. He’d been informed that this was incorrect, and that was why she had so many. Apparently, the same was also true of shoes.  
Products selected, she lays them all out on the table surface so that they form a neat line all the way across in the order she wants to use them, as she did every morning. When they’d first gotten together, he’d thought this process was rather strange. Now, though, he couldn’t for life of him figure out why he’d thought she’d go about this any differently. It was exactly the kind of thing Terese would do. To be honest, if he wore makeup, he’d probably do things the same way. 

Paul finally locates the cufflinks and sets about putting them on. Across the room, Terese has finished laying out everything, and started on the face products. She’s explained what they all do more than once, but they still all seemed the same to him. She’s quiet this morning, although that isn’t exactly unusual. Getting ready in the morning is one of the only truly mindless tasks she has- so she tends to just switch off, veering off into her own little world. Paul thinks she uses this time to grieve- to take some time first thing to prepare herself for the fact that it doesn’t matter where she goes or what she does throughout the course of the day, Joshua won’t be there. For all her appearance of picking herself up and carrying on, Terese’s grief for her son was still a raw, painful wound laying just beneath the surface. It’s a pain he knows well himself, and it kills him knowing that she feels it too. Paradoxically, he’s also a little bit grateful- it’s almost freeing, living alongside somebody who knows that same kind of loss and he’s able to connect with Terese on a much deeper level than anyone else he’s ever met because of it. 

She’s finished applying the face products now and, as he decides which tie to wear, is moving onto the eyes. Paul’s been captivated by her eyes pretty much since their first ever meeting. They told him exactly what she was thinking. They sparkled with amusement, flashed dangerously when she was angry, and became wistful and thoughtful when she thought others weren’t looking. Best of all, they looked at him with an intensity and love that took his breath away. Still as thrilling and intoxicating now as it had been the first time.

Terese becomes distracted from her task all of a sudden, and she stops what she’s doing to straighten up one of the photo frames on her dressing table. There are photos all around their bedroom- all over the house, actually- but the photos in their room are a selection of their most personal memories.  
The one she’s straightened is a photo of Terese and her grandmother, taken on a trip to Greece when she was about five; a reminder of the woman she’s idolised all these years, even from the opposite side of the world. It sits next to a photo of Terese and Nick, taken when she was seven and he was twelve, sat at a piano, both deep in concentration. They’re they only pictures she has of her childhood. The only surviving remnants of a turbulent upbringing.  
Physically, at least.  
He sees the psychological scars it’s left every day. It’s in the relentless work ethic she sees as a barrier between the life she had and the life she could provide for her kids. It’s in the ferocious temper she’s not always able to manage, and the way she always seems prepared for everything she’s built to come crumbling down around her. It’s also in the way she taps her fingers on her desk when everything gets a bit too much- a coping mechanism she developed as a teenager, whilst fighting a losing battle against bulimia, Desperately trying to maintain some control. It can be hard sometimes, Paul thinks, when you think the world of someone, but they think very little of themselves.  
Opposite are some family photos. One of Ned, Imogen and Joshua meeting Piper the day she was born and baby photos of each of them. The other is of Terese and Josh on the beach. The first time he’d seen that photo he’d been struck by just how young Terese had been when she’d had the twins- it was actually scary to think she was about the same age then as Roxy was now. The more he’d looked at it, though, the more taken he was by the way his wife looked at her son. Such a fierce love and dedication. It almost hurt to look at it, knowing as he did how it would all eventually end. 

There were photos of the two of them scattered around the room as well. The one that had been taken at some sort of hotel event before they were even together. He’d kept it with him all these years; hidden in a desk drawer or stashed away in his folio. These days it sat pride of place on his bedside table, in a frame Terese had gifted him for that very purpose. It sat next to one taken at Pierce and Chloe’s wedding last year. Neither of them had even been aware they’re photo had been taken until Chloe had sent it to Terese. They were sat in the corner of the room hands intertwined on the table, their foreheads touching, gentle smiles on both their faces. Paul couldn’t figure out if he’d just kissed her, or was just about to, but either way, it was beautifully personal. The third one had been taken on their honeymoon- they’d spent a few days in Brussels and Terese had surprised him with a trip to the Belgian Comic Strip Center. He’d been in full nerd-mode that day, excitedly explaining the ins and outs of _The Adventures of Tintin_ to his wife. Paul wasn’t sure she fully appreciated the genius that was Hergé, but she’d still spent the day listening to his wittering’s with a contented, gentle smile and a patience most people didn’t realise she possessed. This picture had appeared on his nightstand a few weeks after they had gotten back, and it was possibly his favourite. It had to be really, it contained two of his favourite things in this world: Terese, and the rocket from _Destination Moon_. 

Paul looked back over to his wife, only to meet her gaze in the mirror, makeup complete. Amusement danced across those eyes of hers, her face graced with a hint of the smile that was always the highlight of his day.  
“You need some help with that?” She asked teasingly. He must have looked confused, because she chuckled gently, turning on her chair to face him.  
“Your tie.” she said indicating to the offending object, “You’ve been stood there looking at it for a while now.”  
He looked at the tie in his hands sheepishly before setting about putting it on, which only made her laugh again.  
“You were away with the fairies, weren’t you?”  
“No.” He protested, trying to think of something to say, “I was just… _thinking_.”  
“About anything interesting?” She asked, getting up from her chair and walking over to him. He abandoned his half-tied tie to wrap his arms around her waist, “Just how lucky I am to be married to you.”  
Terese hummed in response, whether out of acknowledgement, appreciation or amusement Paul wasn’t quite sure, her hands moving to fix his tie.  
“You’re becoming soft in your old age, you know that?”  
Amusement. It had definitely been amusement.  
Before Paul could think of a reply, Terese had extracted herself from his embrace, crossing the room and opening the door.  
“Come on,” she said, “We should get a start on breakfast before Roxy drinks all the milk and I have to spend all day listening you complain about it.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading!  
> I referenced a lot of different episodes in this so I thought I'd include a list if you're interested in rewatching some old episodes.  
> Terese hasn't mentioned much about her childhood, the only information we really have is in episodes 7064/7065 and 7685, so I've taken a bit of dramatic license.  
> She mentions her struggle with bulimia in episodes 6720 and 6723. It's not been mentioned since, which is a shame, because I actually think it makes a lot of sense with Terese's character.  
> The Tintin stuff comes from episode 7040. Terese isn't actually in this episode, but there's somehow some pretty good Praise content- Naomi goes all out to impress Paul for his birthday by getting Terese to tell her all about his favourite things.it's pretty cute in hindsight.  
> The first picture of Paul/Terese I referenced was seen in Paul's desk drawer in episode 7423 during the 2016 Great Praise Split.  
> The tapping thing is another one I've used a bit of creative license on. I first noticed it in 7642, when Terese reveals her breast cancer diagnosis, but I've picked up on it a couple of other times before and since, not sure if its intentional or not but I decided to run with it.  
> Well done if you've managed to make it this far! Feedback is much appreciated. x


End file.
